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Author Topic: Welcome Veronica97  (Read 1986 times)
Alan
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piggysiggy
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« on: November 06, 2012, 09:57:17 AM »

Dear Veronica97,

I'm glad you decided to check us out.  Here you will find a low key, laid back situation, where you can "let your hair down" and just be yourself.  There are no trolls or dive-bombers here to throw our threads off track and render them stupid.  Well actually we get off topic all the time, but just because we want to rather than being dragged there by the Rhetoric And Morality Police.    Roll Eyes

Hey, I know ... I think I'll start referring to such posters as RAMPs.  Grin

Yes, so I was saying we are RAMP-free in addition to WordsFree!  Cheesy

Please feel at home to read or post anywhere the software lets you.  Here we don't mind bringing up old threads either, so if you're looking at something from way back and want to post on it, go for it!    Cool

Alan  
« Last Edit: November 06, 2012, 09:59:57 AM by Alan » Logged

... love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.
Veronica97
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« Reply #1 on: November 21, 2012, 12:06:07 AM »

Thank you!   Smiley
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Veronica97
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« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2013, 10:59:46 AM »

I've been checking out the WF board now and again since I joined...but I'm back in the hopes that I can find a "less scary" environment than another catholic forum I have frequented.  I've learned a lot from that forum--a lot of it I should have already known but neglected to learn over the years--and I'm grateful for that.  I  have also met some good people who have patiently replied to my numerous "Is this a sin?" posts.   The other catholic forum is also good place to go if you want to request prayers for yourself or others.  Having said that, it  has also made my scruples worse.  It has helped to plant seeds that have caused me much worry.  When I came back to confession almost 2 years ago (having not been for 7 years), I went from having a dangerous "I know better than the Church--I'm saved no matter what I believe or do" attitude to a scrupulous fearful "No matter what I do I'll always have one foot hanging over a precipice" attitude.  (This is not the fault of the catholic forum-- with my OCD it would have happened anyway--but I think some of the posts on the forum have helped to reinforce this attitude.)  My pastor has said that most of my current sins are careless mistakes or lack of judgement and that I need to trust in God's mercy.   Now that I've learned enough to build a foundation for my faith, I'm hoping that I can find a more supportive environment that will help me to trust in God's mercy.
« Last Edit: June 25, 2013, 12:42:07 AM by Veronica97 » Logged
Veronica97
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« Reply #3 on: June 18, 2013, 11:10:43 AM »

 I should also note...that the cause of my reversion 2 years ago was that a family member encouraged me to watch a couple of videos about people who have had visions of Hell.  They literally scared me straight!  God knew they would, and He used them to bring me Home.  I'm ever grateful for that...I don't know if I would have ever taken my Faith seriously had it not been for these videos.  But fear should be a spark for conversion, and once you've repented and turned back to the Lord, you shouldn't be living in constant fear.  And that's what I've been doing. 
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ncjohn
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« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2013, 12:43:26 PM »

Glad to see you back Veronica. Like many of us you have seen the double-edged sword that CAF can be.

The videos you mention sound like they have successfully walked a fine line with you. Such things can be used to beat someone into submission through fear or they can be a reminder of how we have started to take something for granted that we don't want to lose to neglect. It is a most valuable reminder, just as it is in a friendship, marriage, or any other relationship, that if we don't do the hard work of maintaining the relationship it will die.
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"Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called children of God."
This is the effect of true charity, to be on good terms with all men, to consider no one your enemy, and to live at peace with those who hate peace.--Robert Bellarmine
Alan
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« Reply #5 on: June 18, 2013, 02:29:18 PM »

But fear should be a spark for conversion, and once you've repented and turned back to the Lord, you shouldn't be living in constant fear.  And that's what I've been doing. 

I like the way you say this.  We know we shouldn't be living in fear.  It sounds like you have an active mind, and can think of many ways to look at the same thing.  There are always things that can go wrong at any moment, so the question might be how do we function without fearing those things, while not turning a blind eye to them either.  Since so many of us were taught the "fire and brimstone" approach (btw I don't believe in the fire/brimstone model of hell anyway but that's another thing) that we think our religion is telling us to always be mindful of every possible thing we might do wrong, lest it separate us from God, or distract us from God, or whatever.  I credit this to an overly academic and apologetic approach to teaching religion.  We are told a lot of facts, some of which are comforting and some scarier than hell, but really we aren't given a lot of guidance on how to process these things.

When I was 42, I met with a spiritual director for the first time.  Never heard of one before my wife's friend recommended it for me.  That's when I started learning about contemplative prayer and the spiritual journey.  Now after 12 years, it has totally opened me up and renewed me.  Or rather the Lord has, but really a lot of whether the Lord can work a miracle in us is how much we can open up to Him.  And the better we learn to lose our fears the easier that becomes.  It is a process; you may have sudden breakthroughs, setbacks, or gradual improvements, or more likely some combination.  But if you learn to listen more to your own heart and tone down a bit on the work-in-progress that is what your head is trying to process out of hundreds of other people's voices that have planted themselves there (if that isn't a good description please correct me) you will begin to trust and learn how to walk in the shadow of the valley of death, while fearing no evil.  Smiley

Alan
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... love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.
Veronica97
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« Reply #6 on: June 18, 2013, 08:50:15 PM »




  We are told a lot of facts, some of which are comforting and some scarier than hell, but really we aren't given a lot of guidance on how to process these things.


Boy, did you hit the nail on the head!!  After two years of diligent study, I know many "facts"--I just can't always apply them to my own situations.  Oh, I can see BIG things (murder/adultery/robbing a bank) and I can see black and white (You either stole the candy bar or you didn't--venial sin or no sin).  What I can't seem to deal with are those "gray" areas.  Take moral law vs. civil law for example. ( Ahhh....reckless vs. careless driving....there's a good one for moral debate.) Or what about what goes on within your own mind...no consent, partial consent, full consent...impure or blasphemous thoughts are the bane of my existence!  But I will say one thing...I've been fighting impure thoughts all day.  Mainly because I've been FEARING them, which brings them on, of course.  But you know what?  I thought to myself, "I FEAR these thoughts because I fear SIN.  In order to sin mortally I have to ENJOY the thoughts---not only be GLAD they're coming but HOLD ON to them because I WANT them to stay.  How can I be enjoying the thoughts when they cause me so much FEAR and UPSET? There's no way this is full consent--even if I can't stop obsessing about the thoughts!"  And so then something happened that has never happened before....I got MAD...not at God, not at myself, but at my OCD.  I told my OCD, "I'm sick of you and the hold you have on my life!!"  OCD and the devil both (and I think he does use my OCD and my anxiety to try to make me despair and to keep me focused on myself so I don't focus on God and others) can take a flying leap...I'm sick of them both trying to scare me and upset me.   And you know what?  I think my anger has made the thoughts subside!  Oh, I don't imagine I've won the war...but I think I've won a battle today!  
« Last Edit: June 25, 2013, 12:15:04 AM by Veronica97 » Logged
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